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Saturday, June 15, 2024

MEN WHY WE HATE : Episode 4 

I paused for a minute, taking a deep breath when I reached the door. Was I about to commit murder? My heart was severely broken, and I was hurt. But I wasn’t ready to spend the rest of my life in jail for murdering the idiot. Scenes of him having pleasurable moments with his ex flashed through my mind again. My eyes began welling up with tears; I was angry that I couldn’t kill him and get away with it.

I wanted him to feel the hurt I felt. The doorbell rang again, interrupting my thoughts. I reluctantly walked back to the kitchen to return the knife and went to answer the door; just as I had suspected, it was him.

He smiled when I opened the door, but I could tell he was a little uneasy, mainly because I didn’t return his smile. As usual, he did a good job trying to cover up, but I could read him like a book. “Did you forget something?” I finally asked, still standing at the door. “I think I left my phone,” he said, looking over my shoulders towards the sofa. He tried to get past me then I pulled out the phone from my back pocket and handed it over. “Here you go,” I said, hitting the phone on his chest and studying his reaction. I had decided to keep everything to myself; I didn’t want to confront him so he wouldn’t know I had gone through his phone.Nonso was the kind of guy that wouldn’t admit anything till caught in the act, and even when he was, he always did everything to twist the story.

In this case, the only evidence I had against him was on his phone. He had mentioned several times that he hated it when people went through his phone without permission. I knew that if I told him what I had just seen, he’d probably lie about everything and focus on the fact that I went through his phone, using that against me. He had successfully done it many times in the past, so I decided to play it cool till I could come up with a better plan to catch him red-handed. It was bizarre. I couldn’t explain how he had such a strong hold on me. I don’t know if it was because he was the first and only man I’d ever slept with; I just couldn’t say no to him, and I couldn’t stand to see him hurt or sad. So often, even when I knew I was right and he was wrong, I let him have his way so that peace would reign.

I looked at him in disgust while I waited for him to turn back and head home. I’m sure that from my reaction, he figured something was wrong.”Are you okay?” He asked, looking guilty and concerned at the same time. “I’m okay,” I said, keeping a straight face, “I’m just tired.” I could tell he wasn’t convinced but knew better than to ask further questions.”I have to go now; I’m late for my appointment,” he said, giving me a peck on the cheek and dashing off. As soon as he left, I cried my eyes out and decided to deal with him when appropriate.Later that evening, I called my best friend, Seun, and told him what had happened. The video with his ex bothered me the most of everything I had discovered. “Why do you think he slept with her?” I asked him. “There are many reasons he could’ve done that,” Seun began, “it’s possible he still finds her irresistible, she’s terrific in bed, or she’s giving him something you’re not. But it doesn’t change the fact that he loves you.”

I was more confused than ever before when he finished his sentence. I felt like that was the most absurd thing I’d heard all year, especially coming from a guy who didn’t even cheat on his girlfriend. I couldn’t understand how a guy would put his lips on another woman’s, get naked in front of her, sleep with her, record it, save it on his phone and still use the same dirty mouth to say he loved his girlfriend. How on earth is that love? How do guys even do that and look their partners in the eye without feeling guilty?

The only thing I was thankful for was that I hadn’t gotten sexually transmitted infections (STIs) so far. I made up my mind that I was never making the mistake of sleeping with him without protection again. No matter how horny you feel, never have unprotected sex with your partner, especially if the person sleeps around. There are many STIs; some people may not even know they have them. Some STIs don’t have any symptoms, while others have symptoms like genital sores, discharge from the penis, foul-smelling vaginal discharge, and painful sex. Make sure to see a doctor for treatment if you experience any of these symptoms and ensure that your sexual partner also gets tested and treated; otherwise, you stand the chance of reinfection.

After hanging up the call with Seun, I went into Detective Sonia mode; I decided to set a trap to catch Nonso myself, so he wouldn’t be able to deny anything. I created a new Facebook account using a picture of a random beautiful African girl I saw online. I named her Kinga. Then, I quickly put a couple of other random pictures, including one of a group of girls posing at a party, and captioned it “friends for life”. Finally, I updated all other details with fake info and made my privacy settings as tight as possible. Not even my Facebook friends could see how many friends I had or view any photos I was tagged in. When my fake account was ready, I started a conversation with him. I sent him a message saying I was a Kenyan babe who had just been transferred to Nigeria by my company and was looking to make new friends. I patiently waited for him to reply. Part of me knew he would respond; I figured it’d be difficult for him to resist the beautiful girl in the profile picture. But the other part of me prayed he wouldn’t because it would break my heart if he did.

He replied in less than two hours, saying he thought I was cute and would love to have a Kenyan babe as beautiful as me as a friend. That was how a three-hour-long chat started between Nonso and Kinga. At some point, he sent a friend request, and I accepted. He complained that I didn’t have enough pictures on my Facebook and requested I upload more or send some to him personally. I told him I wasn’t a picture person but promised to try. Then, I took the bold step of asking if he had a girlfriend. I cannot even begin to explain how fast my heart was beating while waiting for the response. Although I had hoped he would at least admit to having a girlfriend, he blatantly denied it and said he was looking for one.

I’d had enough at that point, but I still needed more concrete proof, so I kept playing along.

The conversation went from cordial to dirty, even requesting nudes at one point. I promised to send some after our first meeting. Motivated, he immediately asked for my phone number and set up a meeting at a hotel restaurant the next day. I told him I hadn’t had time to get a SIM card yet but would appreciate it if he could assist me in getting one when we met, and he agreed. That was how a date with Kinga was set for 6 pm after work the next day.

I still needed to trap him more, so the next day, I called him around 5 pm and asked if we could see a movie together.

“Not today, babe. I’m working late; I have a deadline to meet. We’ll go tomorrow, I promise,” he said.

I offered to come to his office to wait till he was done so we could catch the last movie showing, but he said he’d be too tired, so I gave up.Shortly after, he sent a message to Kinga telling her he was on his way to the restaurant, had reserved a table for two, and was hoping they could spend the night together afterwards. I replied that I was excited and was looking forward to spending the rest of my night with my first Nigerian date.

An hour later, I walked into the lobby of the 5-star hotel where Nonso had planned to meet Kinga and asked for directions to the restaurant. It looked beautiful, and I’m pretty sure the food on their menu was very expensive. I couldn’t believe he was willing to spend so much on a total stranger when he hadn’t even taken me to an ordinary fast food joint in over three months.

The table he had reserved wasn’t too far from the door. I could see him through the glass doors, so I called him on the phone and waited to see what he’d do. At first, he didn’t pick up. Then, when I kept calling, he cut the call and sent a message that read, “In a meeting.” I just smiled to myself after reading it. After that, I logged into Kinga’s Facebook and sent him a message saying I was at the hotel lobby and would be with him shortly.

He responded, “That’s great. I can’t wait to finally meet you in person”. I watched him hurriedly adjust his shirt and tie and waited a few more minutes before walking into the restaurant. He was backing the door and didn’t see me walk in. So I went straight to the table where he was seated and tapped him on the shoulder from behind. “Hi Nonso, nice to finally meet you; it’s me, Kinga,” I said as he turned to face me with confusion and shock written all over his face like someone who had just seen a ghost.

Find out what happens next in Episode 5

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